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Hurdles

Submitted by Rosewood Apothecary on Fri, 2022-09-30 03:01

It’s smiles for miles
Through all the trials
I’m high stepping hurdles
With ease and some style

Hurdles get higher
Feet become mired
I’m dragged down to earth
Deflated and tired

Choose naught but to rise
Dry off my eyes
Patch up skinned knees and
Relinquish the cries

The race knows no end
Follows no trend
It’s likely to break me
Lest I learn to bend

Style / type:

Structured: Western

Review Request (Intensity):

I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Last few words:

Or “whack-a-mole”.

Editing stage:

Editing - polished draft

Content level:

Not Explicit Content

Comments

Geezer

Fri, 2022-09-30 10:20

I like...

everything about this! Your title, the word choices and the theme. One thing I'm not sure of how to interpret is: "whack-a-mole"
I am perplexed! ~ Geez.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

Rosewood Apothecary

Fri, 2022-09-30 10:31

Is an arcade game where little groundhogs or whatever they are pop up out of the random holes in the machine and you bash them with the padded mallet. They keep popping up and you can never get them all. It’s a metaphor for the challenges life throws at you.

Hey, who reads the authors comments anyway? Lol just kidding with you.

Thanks Geez,
Tim

author comment

Geezer

Fri, 2022-09-30 16:29

I know about...

whack-a-mole, I just wasn't sure about how you were using the metaphor. ~ Geez.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

RoseBlack

Sat, 2022-10-01 09:17

This is great

The ups and downs and overcoming them when you hit the bottom! Your poems always have such a profound meaning and speak to realistic situations faced by many each day (both positive and negative). Always a pleasure to read. Good job!

~RoseBlack~

Rosewood Apothecary

Sat, 2022-10-01 11:22

Love

I love all you so much and as good as I am with words there simply aren’t ones that convey the emotional support I feel here.

You are all kind beyond reckoning
Thanks for welcoming me home
Tim

author comment

Lavender

Mon, 2022-10-03 16:04

Hurdles

Hi, Tim,
I can relate to this so well! You are a great advocate, for yourself and others!
Thank you!
L
P.S. Unfortunately, sometimes in life we are the mole, and other times we are the mallet.

Neopoet

Hurdles