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TIME AND SUN ARE GODS for ALL (A REVISION)

Submitted by lovedly on Wed, 2022-09-28 22:07

you must know
SUN IS ENERGY GOD
No human can do anything
since ages gone
ages to go

EARTH will have
BIGWIGS
so many have come and gone

now we have AC's
what else to cool off

fruits and trees
juices and produces
we had all overflowing then
had lesser population

now we have samples to see
leeches peaches
later may be perfumes
like essences mostly

still rich will enjoy bubbly' s
CHAMPAGNE
we red or white wine

Lesson learnt
pass time
pray sun comes each day
gives free VIT D to all
KING QUEEN TALL AND SMALL
THANK THE POETS
et al

Hope it's better now
Gee

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 
Editing - rough draft
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

Geezer

Thu, 2022-09-29 12:46

Geezer's picture
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what your intention was in this write and cannot give a reason other than the context seems garbled and maybe a bit unsure of that intent. ~ Geez.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

lovedly

Thu, 2022-09-29 13:51

lovedly's picture

created on some poets despair
why top guys are not controlling GLOBAL WARMING
etc abstract
so it appears mine to you GEE May skip.....

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