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#haiku 6

Submitted by Marvel Godwyn on Tue, 2018-01-30 17:41

a wren flaps away
beak full of juicy meal worms
for fledglings revel

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
How was my language use?
How does this theme appeal to you?
Editing stage: 
Editing - rough draft

Comments

Marvel Godwyn

Wed, 2018-01-31 05:34

Marvel Godwyn's picture

Yes Molly78 ,you are totally right and I thank you so much for this comment.I appreciate it.

author comment

raj

Wed, 2018-01-31 05:47

Vivid imagery created by you Marvel in this Haiku....a pleasure to read it...

regards..

raj (sublime_ocean)

Marvel Godwyn

Wed, 2018-01-31 08:05

Marvel Godwyn's picture

Thanks so much raj, I appreciate your comment.

author comment

Marvel Godwyn

Wed, 2018-01-31 08:05

Marvel Godwyn's picture

Thanks so much raj, I appreciate your comment.

author comment

raj

Wed, 2018-01-31 05:49

if you haven't visited the Forum topic of IRiz as yet in which she is proposing an even more trimmed form, I suggest you visit it...likely to interest you...

Regards...

raj (sublime_ocean)

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