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MAKE ME LAUGH
Start with a smile,
And tell me a joke,
make me laugh,
my funny bloke.
Tell me again
fill life with fun
reel them off quick
until I am done.
Laughing my socks off
take to the stage
honing your humour
my comedian sage.
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction):
What did you think of my title?
Last few words:
This is what gets me through the day, laughing.
It's always good to have a laugh, even better if the person makes you laugh because they know you'll spend your day with a smile and a memory. Ruby :) xx
Editing stage:
Contest:
Content level:
Not Explicit Content
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Comments
neopoet
Tue, 2023-12-26 14:20
Neopoet AI (premium) - 5-29-23 version
The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:
The poem "MAKE ME LAUGH" demonstrates a clear structure and rhythm, which is commendable. The use of rhymes in each stanza provides a sense of cohesion and continuity throughout the piece.
However, the poem could benefit from a more varied vocabulary. The use of common phrases such as "laughing my socks off" and "tell me a joke" can make the poem feel somewhat predictable. Experimenting with more unique or unexpected language could add a layer of intrigue and depth to the piece.
Additionally, the poem could explore more deeply the relationship between the speaker and the "funny bloke." As it stands, the reader is left with a somewhat superficial understanding of their dynamic. Delving into this relationship more could provide an emotional weight to the poem, making it more engaging for the reader.
Lastly, the poem could benefit from more descriptive language. The current language is quite direct and literal, which can limit the reader's imagination. By incorporating more metaphorical or symbolic language, the poem could evoke a stronger emotional response from the reader.
Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact
Michael Anthony
Tue, 2023-12-26 10:33
Enjoyed this Ruby! Could not
Enjoyed this Ruby! Could not agree more about laughter. t's always been my constant and familiar companion. Thanks for sharing this.
Best
Michael Anthony
Ruby Lord
Tue, 2023-12-26 11:49
Thank you for reading and
Thank you for reading and commenting. I don't know if it's the holiday feeling but my husband has been very funy for the past few weeks, I mean funnier than usual and without trying, I think. Much appreciate your comments and yes, I love to laugh at every opportunity. Ruby :) xx
Give and grow - let's raise our verses together. I'm happy to comment on your work and appreciate a comment on mine.
Geezer
Tue, 2023-12-26 11:50
This...
makes me smile. My sister always says, "Grab a laugh." I'm sure that my smile will get me further down the road to a laugh.
Thank you. ~ Geez.
.
There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.
Ruby Lord
Tue, 2023-12-26 11:56
My husband says loads of fun
My husband says loads of fun stuff to me. One of my favourites is as follows:
Are you happy?
Yes, why?
I wish you'd tell your face.
He says it in the way a real mancunian would. Ruby :) xx
Give and grow - let's raise our verses together. I'm happy to comment on your work and appreciate a comment on mine.
Michael Anthony
Tue, 2023-12-26 11:58
Love it!
Love it!
Michael Anthony
Ruby Lord
Tue, 2023-12-26 12:05
Thank you, he's always making
Thank you, he's always making me laugh :) xx
Give and grow - let's raise our verses together. I'm happy to comment on your work and appreciate a comment on mine.
Candlewitch
Tue, 2023-12-26 16:08
Dear Ruby,
I love it!!!
Steven and I make the other laugh. I think it is the secret of our marriage. That... and we listen, and say thank you when we do things for the other. it sounds like you have a great marriage, too!
*love, Cat
*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.
Ruby Lord
Wed, 2023-12-27 05:27
Hi Cat, thank you for your
Hi Cat, thank you for your read and comments. Yes, it's great to be appreciated and feel you self appreciated for all the things you do. Ruby :) xx
Give and grow - let's raise our verses together. I'm happy to comment on your work and appreciate a comment on mine.
Unca Fez
Tue, 2023-12-26 16:18
Laughter Makes The Day
Laughter makes the day, so I always appreciate a good laugh. Cat's sense of humor is just about as warped as mine is, which is one of the reasons why, in 42 years, we have managed to not kill each other. ;)
A really good read that reminds us of a simple remedy to doom and gloom.
Thanx,
Steve
Ruby Lord
Wed, 2023-12-27 05:29
Hi Steve, thank you for your
Hi Steve, thank you for your read and comments. I wanted to do something straightforward and simple this time. Ruby :) xx
Give and grow - let's raise our verses together. I'm happy to comment on your work and appreciate a comment on mine.
William Lynn
Sat, 2024-01-27 20:40
Hello Ruby.
Hello Ruby.
Sorry to be so late in commenting. Somehow I missed the poem and just tonight found it.
Let the laughter begin. My friends often comment on what I find funny but if they only knew I find humor everyday where others may not. Laughter is the opposite crying, and I will choose laughter whenever I can. Thanks! - Will
Ruby Lord
Sun, 2024-01-28 05:29
Hi William, no worries. I
Hi William, no worries. I like laughing, I'm sure we all do and like you, I find my humour is not always the same as others. Maybe that's why laughing is so good for us?
Have a great Sunday, make sure it is full of laughter and giggles. Ruby :) xx
Give and grow - let's raise our verses together. I'm happy to comment on your work and appreciate a comment on mine.