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I Can Hardly Wait

Submitted by Kelly Ann Wilson on Mon, 2024-09-16 23:28

I Can Hardly Wait
Written by Kelly Ann Wilson

My friend said life moves in circles
Like the seasons
To comfort me when I was grieving,
And I still hear her words in my mind.

Oh, how I soaked up all the sunlight.
How I felt it giving me life,
As I buried my feet in the sand
Beside the sea.

But the darkness is coming sooner.
The leaves are losing their emerald colour.
I just know
They’re about to set afire.

And though it’s true that after
Comes the long, cold Northern winter
Won’t fall be such magic?
I can hardly wait for it.

Written September 16, 2024
© 2024 Kelly Ann Wilson

Style / type: 
Free verse
Last few words: 
Read my writer’s blog at https://kwilsonarts.wordpress.com/
Editing stage: 
Editing - polished draft
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

Geezer

Tue, 2024-09-17 00:23

Geezer's picture
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While your description of the cycles of life were spot on, and made me think of beaches, the sea, and the coming fall seasons, I felt there was something missing. Tell us what she said; you did in a general way, but you should have used specific wording, "Life moves in circles, everything comes around in it's time." or something to that effect. I think you had two ideas mixed together.
Making those words give meaning, and relating to how it affected your life.
"Everybody needs a little sun to grow." Give this some direction and it will be great. ~ Geez

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