Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.
another poem by my grandaughter
Nature’s Might
Mother earth teach me your ways,
Away
We go to meet your children,
Earthen
My mind and make me become one with you,
Too,
Many things to learn, but I wish to know,
Show
Me the world beneath my feet,
Greet
Me with your arms of light,
Smite
Those who come to abolish your knights,
Might!
by Isabelle Pacis
Style / type:
Structured: Eastern
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Last few words:
I am so impressed with my grandaughter's poetry skill at 11 year old, I guess that make me a good teacher. Hahaha!
this is really really good!
I'm also in tears of how happy I am.
Eddie C.
I wonder if an 11year old can join Neopoet
Editing stage:
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.
Comments
scribbler
Fri, 2011-04-22 22:53
hi
kind of unusual form but good command of language use. As far as joining, I guess it would be up to parents, but you know a few writes here get a bit graphic in nature lol.......stan
Eduardo Cruz
Fri, 2011-04-22 22:59
Stan
This is Eddie's grandaughter, Isabelle Pacis. I understand it is an unusual form, but it is a type of Western Classic, my grandfather taught me but with different spacing.
Thank you for reading it.
I.P.
LIFE ISN'T ABOUT WAITING FOR THE STORM TO PASS
IT'S ABOUT LEARNING HOW TO DANCE IN THE RAIN.
VIVIAN GREENE
scribbler
Fri, 2011-04-22 23:12
hi
And thus the teacher becomes the student.................stan
Eduardo Cruz
Sat, 2011-04-23 15:09
Stan
As I see what she did here with the structure of the poem I feel like your statement, I'll let her know what you wrote here, I just hope it doesn't go to her head, she is only 11
LIFE ISN'T ABOUT WAITING FOR THE STORM TO PASS
IT'S ABOUT LEARNING HOW TO DANCE IN THE RAIN.
VIVIAN GREENE
CCfire
Fri, 2011-04-22 22:53
Bravo!
It's always lovely to see someone care about the world they live in, the many things it gives us and offers us and we must make an effort to notice it and preserve it. Well done here Isabelle :)
Chez
"The perfect woman perpetrates literature as she does a small sin: as an experiment, in passing, to see if anybody notices it - and to makes sure that somebody does." - Nietzsche
Eduardo Cruz
Fri, 2011-04-22 23:01
Chez
It's Isabelle again! I may be what you call a tree-hugger, but I really am happy I started to express how I feel about the world. Thank you very much for your feedback. I am happy it satisfied you.
LIFE ISN'T ABOUT WAITING FOR THE STORM TO PASS
IT'S ABOUT LEARNING HOW TO DANCE IN THE RAIN.
VIVIAN GREENE
Eduardo Cruz
Sat, 2011-04-23 15:18
Rosi you Know this is not my poem
It's my grandchild who is !!yrs old who I've been teaching since she was 7 years old.
thanks though for the comment witch i will forward to her.
As far as the Haiku, I truly wish you would not give up, if you like I can help you privatly in PM's. you have a lot of raw talent that can be taken beyond your presen stage.
LIFE ISN'T ABOUT WAITING FOR THE STORM TO PASS
IT'S ABOUT LEARNING HOW TO DANCE IN THE RAIN.
VIVIAN GREENE
magics02
Sat, 2011-04-23 10:55
I got a tear
In my eyes. This is good Ed. You tell the wonderful young writer that she is to continue her quest of writing. Amazing and how old is she? I love when a young child can express their images or feelings in words. Just great. Keep persuading her to continue on. You know I have a book of Anthology writings from children. It is from 8 to 11 years old and I just love to read what they write with such a young talented mind.
Bravo to Grandaugher and please tell her Ms Mona loves it!! Mother Earth and nature, things that are close to me also
Brilliant
Happy Easter to you and the family Ed
Grazie
Mona
Eduardo Cruz
Sat, 2011-04-23 15:30
Mona
I will pass your words of in couragement to Isabelle.
thank you so much!
PS. she is !!yrs old, I've been working with her since she was 7
her first post was here when she was 8
LIFE ISN'T ABOUT WAITING FOR THE STORM TO PASS
IT'S ABOUT LEARNING HOW TO DANCE IN THE RAIN.
VIVIAN GREENE