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a foolishness
blithely adding to
and making reduction of
the population
which invented Zeus
those high living gods
of old Olympus
asked for sacrifice, destruction
uncaring
until their creators
voted
against them
we read of
their downfall
their flaws
for mankind finally wrote into
the history of myth
mishaps of
no-longer-wanted-deities
(deciding, perhaps
one god would do)
and had them annihilated
in a heavenly war
little has changed I am sad to report
to have our say today
we still mould or break him
and invent his voice
.
Style / type:
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage:
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.
Comments
Rula
Tue, 2012-09-25 01:04
dear Judy
I've started to think you know about the Greek Mythology just as much as you know about your own life. :) though it is not always easy-for me as a reader to relate and therefore to enjoy the read.
If I am to pick I'd admit I found the first stanza the most memorable where it referes to the carlessness of today's human beings and the destruction they cause all around
but as I am not fully aware of the other deities and gods , I can't say how this is memorable for me in one way or another .
May be adding a reference stanza by the middle would make it easier to be read..Only a suggestion but you need to hear from the experts I believe..
❤❤❤❤❤❤
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judyanne
Wed, 2012-09-26 09:37
hi rula
thank you for the read and comments
but, again i think you may have mis-read me
all my fault i imagine - not making myself clear :)
i'm not really naming any of the gods - just referring to them in general, and how we write them in and out of our history to suit ourselves...
love judy
xxx
'Each for the joy of the working, and each, in his separate star,
shall draw the Thing as he sees It, for the God of Things as They are.'
(Rudyard Kipling)
BlueDemon77
Tue, 2012-09-25 00:50
Well done Judy!
I've always preferred the pyre of the last hero setting the heavens on fire (Die Gotterdammerung)but I certainly see where you're coming from with your poem as well.
Ron
Blue Demon77
"What I want is to be what I was before the knife,
before the brooch pin, before the salve, fixed me in this parenthesis:
Horses fluent in the wind. A place, a time gone out of mind."
The Eye Mote-Sylvia Plath
judyanne
Wed, 2012-09-26 09:43
thanks ron
thanks ron
lol - i wouldn't attempt to compete with wagner... or the norse myths - 'though i always liked the name Brynhildr lol
love judy
xxx
'Each for the joy of the working, and each, in his separate star,
shall draw the Thing as he sees It, for the God of Things as They are.'
(Rudyard Kipling)
weirdelf
Tue, 2012-09-25 08:57
hmmm... good, but
to me it doesn't break new ground or challenge much established thought. Especially the idea that one god over many might be an advancement. Remember in this workshop the ideas themselves are open to critique.
Beautifully written, of course.
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
judyanne
Wed, 2012-09-26 10:12
thanks jess
yes - i know i have done better
but as far as saying that one god is an advancement - i didn't
i was more doing a tongue in cheek - the ancients decided perhaps that one god would be easier to control .... (‘deciding one god would do’) i thought the cynicism was there - but it obviously wasn't - will have to work on it
thanks again
love judy
xxx
'Each for the joy of the working, and each, in his separate star,
shall draw the Thing as he sees It, for the God of Things as They are.'
(Rudyard Kipling)
BlueDemon77
Thu, 2012-09-27 01:13
I've always gotten a kick out of the Greek pantheism
I always loved how their gods represented the foibles and failings of human beings. I think most in the modern age have forgotten the ability to believe in a playful god rather than a jealous, vengeful one. The latter reeks of social control.
Ron
Blue Demon77
"What I want is to be what I was before the knife,
before the brooch pin, before the salve, fixed me in this parenthesis:
Horses fluent in the wind. A place, a time gone out of mind."
The Eye Mote-Sylvia Plath
judyanne
Thu, 2012-09-27 07:48
yes ron
i think that's why i have always loved the tales too
and an astute observation there about social control...
xxx
'Each for the joy of the working, and each, in his separate star,
shall draw the Thing as he sees It, for the God of Things as They are.'
(Rudyard Kipling)
weirdelf
Thu, 2012-09-27 01:19
or maybe I just missed the cynicism
my fallibility knows no bounds.
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
judyanne
Thu, 2012-09-27 07:45
lol no
i think i need to make it clearer
thanks jess
xxx
'Each for the joy of the working, and each, in his separate star,
shall draw the Thing as he sees It, for the God of Things as They are.'
(Rudyard Kipling)
Nordic cloud
Wed, 2012-09-26 03:52
St Christopher
Makes me think of how sad my mother was
when St Christopher no longer carried the status of Saint.
Having all her life enjoyed his "company,"
his legend appealed to her so much. :)
L Ann.
"The image of yourself which you see in a mirror Is dead,
but the reflection of the moon on water, lives." Kenzan.
judyanne
Wed, 2012-09-26 09:50
lol annanya
thank you - and i sympathise with your mother - i thought it quite disgusting that they took away christopher's sainthood....
he's still a saint to me :)
love judy
xxx
'Each for the joy of the working, and each, in his separate star,
shall draw the Thing as he sees It, for the God of Things as They are.'
(Rudyard Kipling)
Candlewitch
Wed, 2012-09-26 11:22
Dear Judyanne,
What I like about all your poems is, the great energy and thought that you put into them.
always, Cat
*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.
judyanne
Thu, 2012-09-27 07:49
dearest cat
thank you so much for the lovely comment
hugs
judy
xxx
'Each for the joy of the working, and each, in his separate star,
shall draw the Thing as he sees It, for the God of Things as They are.'
(Rudyard Kipling)