The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:

The poem, "Night Flight!" presents a vivid portrayal of the speaker's struggle with aging and illness, which is a universal human experience. The use of simple language and straightforward narrative makes the poem accessible to a wide range of readers. However, there are areas where the poem could benefit from further refinement.

Firstly, the rhyme scheme is consistent throughout the poem, adhering to an AABB pattern. This consistency is commendable as it gives the poem a rhythmic quality. However, the rhythm is occasionally disrupted by lines of varying lengths. For example, "Mal-functioning liver, kidneys and bowels" is noticeably longer than the other lines in its stanza. To improve the rhythm, consider revising these lines to match the syllable count of the other lines in their respective stanzas.

Secondly, the poem's imagery could be more evocative. While the poem does a good job of describing the speaker's physical condition and surroundings, it could benefit from more sensory details to fully immerse the reader in the speaker's experience. For instance, instead of simply stating "I live in a hospital," the poem could describe the sterile smell of the hospital, the cold touch of the metal bed frame, or the constant beeping of the machines.

Lastly, the poem's theme of aging and illness is clear, but the emotional impact could be heightened by exploring the speaker's feelings in more depth. The lines "My hopes are all fading / I’m shut up inside" hint at the speaker's despair, but this could be expanded upon. What specific hopes are fading? How does being "shut up inside" affect the speaker emotionally? Answering these questions within the poem could make the speaker's plight more poignant to the reader.

In conclusion, "Night Flight!" is a compelling exploration of the human condition, but could benefit from more consistent rhythm, more evocative imagery, and deeper emotional exploration.

Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact

I’m sorry you have to endure such suffering. Aging is a stage we all go through involuntarily, and your words resonate deeply. I’m glad you’re able to express your anxiety in this heartfelt piece. I hope you find relief from your pains and continue to find strength.
Please take care.

I really understand how your health or lack of it, can affect your quality of life. You have written plainly about how you feel and I'm sure, have many to agree with you. I hope that your writing continues to give you some comfort and a way to reach out to the rest of the world. I could picture the long hallway, where you poke around, looking for some kind of interesting thing to do or see. I'm betting that you have been chased out of more than a few places? Keep us informed! Nice job, ~ Geez.
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I much enjoyed your poem about the trials of ageing. I could relate to all of them. I like the title you have given to your poem. I really liked these lines:

I cruise down the long hall
on my black power glide
Searching for shadows
on a mystical ride

I picture a black electric wheelchair, is this correct? and you wheeling around the hospital at night!
finding food for poetry! Keep on Keepin' On!!!

*many hugs and respect, Cat

p.s.
If I did not have Steven, I would be in a nursing home.